time to sensationalize!

this post has been getting a lot of attention today, being spread through H!O and other jpop forums; it’s the funniest thing i’ve read all day:

“Hello, I’m Japanese.

Do you know the fact that the popularity of AKB48 in Japan is FALSE made by a company Dentsu? AKB48 members’ incomes are only 1.2 million yen a year, while H!P members’ incomes are 15-35 million yen a year. Some AKB48 members can receive allowance from the boss by dating with him. They are called “pleasing group” by other members. Make sure that we Japanese need 3 million yen a year at least to live.

Akimoto said “AKB48 hasn’t yielded any profit yet” in May 2010. AKB48 often appears on TV by the power of Dentsu, to make Japanese ppl consider them popular, but there are few fans in Japan actually. No offence. This is the truth. We also know there are many Dentsu spies on the internet in Japan. We can recognize it by identifying their exposed IP addresses. They often appear on 2ch to tell that H!P is unpopular now and already over. If I were good at English, I could’ve given you more information about what happen now in Japan. Sorry. If you are good at Japanese, please read these articles of Shukan Bunshun(週刊文春).

http://hishou.ddo.jp/~bbs/up/img/up913.jpg published in Feb 2010

http://hishou.ddo.jp/~bbs/up/img/up915.jpg published in May 2010

I don’t care if you quit a AKB48’s fan, or not. I just want you to know about the TRUTH.

Thank you.

P.S. AKB48’s fans (or they might be spies of Dentsu) in Japan call momusu mobusu(mo-ugly) and call H!P fans harokasu (haro-piece of shit). I don’t know why they are so indecent, but some ppl say because they are Korean living in Japan. Actually, Dentsu staff are almost Korean originally, and they say some of AKB48 members, too. I’m not racist, but it’s true that Korean hate Japan.”

i guess the secret is out:  i, dae lee, am a korean dentsu spy.  through the insurmountable mecca of power that is 2chan, we are directly responsible for the downfall of H!P.  we payed and recruited tens of thousands of people to act as fans for akb48, and spent even more money getting akb on national television, funding hundreds and hundreds of episodes and appearances for people who don’t even watch them.

it’s been super profitable for us doing so, and everything has been going as planned; world domination is next!  and it’s all thanks to talking trash about morning musume and making people think akb is popular!  aaaahahahahAHHAHAHAHA!!!

you have no reason to doubt the author of that well-informed post; he says he’s japanese!!111!!!!1!1

About Dae Lee

-Dae, aka Mizu -Writer, broadcaster, and podcaster on New School Kaidan

Check Also

New PV Alert: Morning Musume ’19 – The Youthful Night

For their 67th trip out, Morning Musume ’19 take Morito Chisaki (and us) on a …