Volume 8 of “2chan Says the Darndest Things”!
New idol nicknames!?
How Kashiwagi Yuki spends her day?
Your worst fear: your oshimen graduating.
How AKB changed your life.
Does your lover know you’re a wota?
AKS Idol Nicknames
Fujita Runa “Cousin”
Kuwabara Mizuki “The Devil of Tosa”
Ogiso Shiori “Perverted Joke Machine”
Yamauchi Suzuran “Idolfer”
Uchida Mayumi “The Rock”
Matsumoto Rina “The Dark Horse of Sakae”
Suda Akari “The Fisherwoman”
Kikuchi Ayaka “The Bomber That Returned”
Iwasa Misaki “The Indoor Boss Created by the Internet Society”
Miyazaki Miho “Space Fortress”
Kashiwagi Yuki “Idol Master”
Katayama Haruka “Self-Proclaimed 41st”
Ishida Haruka “Dull Butt Girl”
Oba Mina “Middle Finger Queen”
Takahashi Minami “Ribbon Warrior of Effort”
Oya Shizuka “The Girl Who Makes the Impossible, Possible”
Komori Mika “Intracerebral Fantastic World”
Minegishi Minami “Green Dinosaur”
Sugamoto Yuko “This Melon, from Fukuoka”
Kato Rumi “Real Fisher”
Kaneko Shiori “Natural Alien”
What Does Yukirin Do Everyday?
Hangs out with her mom.
Works on her abs.
Training muay thai.
To be serious, coloring and origami.
Stares at the wall in a pitch black room.
Practices soccer <– that’s you! <– Crap, you’ve found out that I’m an idol.
Stares at the sky.
Flirts with Sae.
What Would You Do If Your Oshimen Graduated?
Make them my lover.
Lose happiness in life.
“Sore demo Sukidayo”
Move to Momoclo.
Support their career after their graduation.
Propose to them.
There’s plenty of members so just oshihen.
Graduation = better chance to date them. That’s great.
Smile on your face. Cry inside.
Second oshi turns into first oshi.
Things That Changed After You Started Liking AKB
I stopped saying crap about people. I stopped dissing things in general.
I cared less about other women.
Recordings started to pile up.
Stopped caring about small bumps on the road.
I get teary more often.
I lost the ability to know what an idol is.
I quit a job that I had for 6 years for lack of motivation. I was jobless and drank during the day and lived a pathetic lifestyle for 6 months but when I started watching AKB videos, I gained energy inside and started running during the day time and began to have a positive attitude and started working again. If I didn’t have AKB, I would have committed suicide or be dead in a ditch. I don’t care what other people say, but I thank AKB for that.
My wife and daughter do not call me, “papa” but call me, “creepy wota”. I do not regret a thing.
I started to look at ears and touching them.
I started liking people.
The amount of drinking parties I attended decreased and the amount of the same CDs increased.
I eat way too much Puccho and drink way too much WANDA. I am now diabetic.
I became a real life DD and girls call me a player.
Did You Tell Your Significant Other That You’re a Wota?
I recently got a girlfriend but I don’t have the courage to tell her because it might scare her away. Have you revealed this about yourself? When is the right time to do it?
DON’T TELL HER! You can hide CDs easily but posters and other merch are harder to hide.
Maybe your girlfriend is a wota.
Or a Johnny’s wota.
When you’re about to see her, delete the Google+ app.
What’s a “girlfriend”? Never heard of such thing.
You can’t win against a real woman.