2chan Says the Darndest Things Vol. 12


Volume 12 of “2chan Says the Darndest Things”!

AKB members will get married eventually. Will you guys be able to handle it?

If Mayuyu gets married, it might be tough for me.

What do you mean by not being able to handle it? Why don’t you wish for their happiness? <– I wouldn’t call it a betrayal but I would feel lonely.

I think we would be over them by the time they get married.

I’m going to hyperventilate thinking about it.

It’ll be tough for me when Takamina does.

I wonder if there will be a rush of former AKB members getting married.

I would be happy.

I could handle them getting married but seeing a public divorce in court would make me cry.

I’m a female wota. I guess male wotas are a little bit saddened.

If I hear of my oshimen getting married, I’ll tell myself, “there’s nothing I can do” and then land a diving header into my LCD TV.

If you continue to oshihen to younger members, you’ll have no problems.

I remember Mariko saying that she doesn’t need to get married until she’s in her 40’s. <–I remember Takamina saying something like that too.

DDs will have a tough time because they’ll be hearing marriage and pregnancy of hundreds of girls and being depressed by it.

The wotas that are really in love with the members will go insane.

Kashiwagi and Rena wotas will probably go insane.

The fact that they might be single in their 40’s is depressing as well.

I want my oshi to marry an athlete. Especially a player from a team I like.

I’m fine as long as they don’t marry wotas.

I would be truly happy if Kuramochi marries a wrestler.

If you have a daughter, would you name her after your oshimen?

Like Atsuko or Yuko?

Rino-chan.

Isn’t it weird for my daughter to have the same name as my wife?

Amina isn’t my oshi but I really like her name.

Sawako would be great because I share the symbols in my name but I don’t have anyone to have a daughter with…

I see. If I shout my oshimen/daughter’s name in my sleep, my wife wouldn’t yell at me. <–your wife is made out of plastic, she can’t yell at you. <–no, she’s CG

I named my cat my oshimen’s name.

I named my dog Kanon so I can say, “non, non, non, non, ganbarunon”. <-Kanon, huh? My little sister named her cat that and it got ran over by a car within a year.

An acquaintance named their daughter “Rino” last month and was super depressed.

Miori… yeah… not happening…

Amina has a cute ring to it. I think it works with hiragana as well.

If I have a son, it’ll be Yasushi.

I had a daughter the other day and wanted to name her Rino, Rena or Reina but I think anything with an “R” is hard to pronounce. I’m glad I didn’t especially if I had named her Rino… <-so, what did you name her? <-I named her a name that starts with an “S” and there’s no one in the 48 family with that name <-Shinobu?<- Salamander?

My oshimen is Cleopatra from JKT48. This could be good.

I want to name my daughter my oshimens name and call her by their nickname. <-It would suck if you were calling your daughter, “Katsuo”, “BBA”, or “Jumbo”.

Has an AKB member appeared in your dream?

I slept with Tomochin. <-Same here. I also slept with Tomochin.

I went to Sashiko’s parents’ house and said hi to them.

Nagao Mariya kissed me out of nowhere.

I had a pleasant chat with Kojiharu at a McDonald’s.

Takamina was my little sister.

I was in the same class as Kitarie.

I saw Akicha’s underwear and butt and Amina was next to me for some reason. Then I woke up and was disappointed.

I flirted with Ume-chan.

Acchan kissed me in a strawberry field and she’s my third favorite now.

I asked out Yuko and got rejected.

Jo Eriko was crying and Kobayashi Kana was consoling her.

I dreamt about Yukirin the night of the election and I vowed to try harder next year.

I was childhood friends with Mayuyu and went on a date.

I was dating Takamina but secretly meeting up with Acchan. I seriously want to go back to that dream.

I almost got killed by Gekikara. I struggled against her and somehow she made me her underling.

Amina was half naked and I was sitting on the futon. Amina opened the door and then a cop was standing there smiling.

I was driving a car and Lovetan was sitting in the back telling me how bad I am at driving.

My oshimen was trying to stab me with a knife while laughing.

I was auditioning for AKB and Aki-P was telling me that I need work.

Kasai was in my dream oozing with pheromones. I woke up before it got to the good part. I DID NOT TELL MY WIFE.

Maeda Ami isn’t my oshimen or anything but I was taking part in lessons with her and I was being filmed for a documentary leading up to SSA.

I was watching a movie that featured Yuko and Ume-chan with my dad and it got awkward watching Ume-chan in a love scene.

Akimoto Yasushi told me, “You are going to replace Sashihara in Team A”.

I was going to ask Yukirin out on a date but I fell into Mayuyu’s trap and died a tragic death.

Mii-chan was in my house. She was chasing me so I hid in the bathroom. She was staring at me from above. It was scary.

*All of these are dreams so please forgive us

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3 comments

  1. if you are a fan and haven’t dreamed something akb related, you are missing out

  2. I don’t like these tabloid articles. You should suspend your site. /insidejoke

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